February 24, 2011

Stop grinning, Dolphin!

It’s funny how we just love dolphins, who doesn’t – it’s largely due to that warm, permanent grin on their faces, I think.

However, if they are as intelligent as people lead us to believe (the equivalent of a 5 yr old apparently), I would imagine that having a marine based life, centered around fending off killer whales and sharks, being submersed in cold water all day every day (why are they not wrinkly by the way), and risking being stranded on a distant foreign beach, is likely to render them somewhat gloomy.

Or alternatively, perhaps the inane grin comes from having to perform at Sea World in front of thousands of excited people, in the same way that Pageant Queens appear to have smiles tattooed across their faces.

On the other hand, let’s compare the outward appearances of cats and dogs. Cats are renowned for having an unnerving facial expression that remains completely unchanged for their entire lifetime.

They are the equivalent of 1980s Hollywood stars, clinging to the last grasp of youth and who have consequently received enough Botox in their faces that render them the emotional equivalents of garden snails.

It was the english comedian, Jack Dee, who observed the key difference between the feline and canine species:

If you are putting up a shelf, a dog will sit watching you, wagging it’s tail and thinking ‘I don’t know what you’re doing, but it looks very clever’ whereas a cat will be watching and thinking ‘you don’t want to put it up like that, you’re using the wrong screws, the whole lot will come down using those!’

Wouldn’t it be great if once in a while cats looked at you like this AFTER you have fed them, and dolphins admitted via a series of sequential underwater clicks, that they’re not actually as happy as we think they are!

Posted by Rob Booth | Filed under: All, Comedy, General, Useless but amusing | No comments yet - be the first

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